क्या हुआ??

Well, lately I have decided that I need to get off my butt and learn to cook. I’ve learned how to steam fish, made some decent aloo gobi and some really terrible chicken curry.

Today is memorial day, and I thought that I would go ahead and make some really nice food for my mom and myself. I started yesterday by preparing these tandoori style chicken wings. Basically, I mixed up this yogurt coating which involved cumin, curry powder, cayenne pepper, salt, ground ginger, and red wine vinegar. Threw in the wings, and let them sit overnight. This morning I prepared a delicious mango fruit salad with…mango (of course), red grapes, blackberries and an aromatic dressing made of minced ginger (so much ginger!), lime zest (basically, finely grated lime skin), lime juice, and honey. My mom did her part by preparing the filling for our curried deviled eggs.

In addition to all this, we are grilling some ears of corn.

Everything looks reeeeally good. I’m proud of myself

First of all, something unrelated to New York. With the exception of one A-, I officially have straight A’s for this semester! This has never ever happened in the history of my education.

Now on to my day in New York. So, I set my alarm for 10 am, but I woke up at about 9:30 because I couldn’t sleep. I hopped on the 11:46 train to the city and made it to the Columbia University campus by about 1 o’ clock. Absolutely gorgeous campus, I must say. Unfortunately, I didn’t really get the whole effect because the weather was sooooo gray.

Well, I walked around a bit and got myself some chai to kill time before going to the 6th floor of Kent hall to meet with the professor. Well, for about the first 5 minutes I was kind of nervous. It didn’t help that she promptly shot down my senior project idea by saying that it wasn’t really an interesting idea at all. I guess I appreciated her bluntness. But I think she was really pleased when I said I was learning Urdu. Eventually, she just started giving me things. She gave me a helpful sheet of all the Urdu letters and a packet of Hindi readings. Then she gave me four different books because she said she was looking for “worthy homes” for all her extra books before she retires. I was absolutely flattered that she found me worthy!

After some more chatting about interests and studies she offered to let me check out the library with her. They gave me a pass which is good for the entire summer, so I can totally come back and look at books and stuff. The coolest thing was as I was about to leave and I was thanking her for meeting with me, she started showering me with really nice compliments about how I seemed very able and she liked my attitude and everything. I wish I could remember the exact words she used, but I walked out of there with a huge smile on my face and a great feeling of encouragement. She’s been at Columbia, a top Ivy League school, for 25 years. So if she thinks I have potential, then I must be doing something right!

She gave me some really cool books, too. One is an intermediate hindi book which is about 20 years old, it should be really good for practice. Then there’s a smallish english-urdu dictionary which is purely transliteration based. She also gave me a book about poetry devoted to Kali and Uma and then a collection of translated short stories by Premchand. So, I think that’s a good start to my scholarly library!

After all this, I was meaning to go to the Met Museum of Art. I even took the subway over the 77th street….but then…oh god I was just so tired and wanted to get back to my couch. So here I am, I’ll probably take a nap or just sleep. I’ve run myself absolutely ragged over this trip. But brainally, I feel amazing. Except for the fact that I’m making up words like brainally

As everyone who has read this blog knows; my life has pretty much sucked for a few years. A lot of things still do suck. My dad moved out this month. He still has taken no responsibility for anything. My family…well, has ceased to exist, really. Last but not least, my mom changed our phone number. It was a needed change for her, I guess. For some reason it’s just been amazingly hard for me.

But…I’m euphoric. Outside of the things in my life that I cannot change, everything is going so well. I feel, for once, that I am actually in the right place. Just a couple days ago I was offered the position of Research Assistant with the professor that I really admire. Just out of the blue! And here I was, worried that my final paper in his class was a complete flop. It’s a paid position and it’s apparently a lot of “busy work,” but I have to start somewhere!

On top of this, I’m meeting with an amazing professor at Columbia University today. This woman studied in Lahore in 1979 and after looking through her website….I just cannot believe how much information she must have inside her head. Well, I should start getting ready so I can get to the campus at a reasonable time. Wish me luck!!

Today I totally got up at a reasonable time and made the 10:46 train out to the now-too-familiar Penn Station. With amazing skill, I located the correct subway and scooted up to 81st street and the Museum of Natural History. This place was way cool, I spent almost a whole hour in the Asian Peoples area; oogling the Zoroastrian texts written in Gujarati and about 8 different statues and carvings and Ganeshji…among many other pretty educational and visually appealing artifacts. Also, included in my citypass ticket was this really cheesy, but kind of fun, SPACE SHOOOW. I ignored the narration mostly, and just watched the pretty stars move around above my head.

Once I had my fill of the museum, I crossed the road and made another visit the Central Park. I love that place so much. One of my favorite things about it is looking through the greenery and seeing a skyscraper peeking through, or seeing all the wildlife while hearing some taxi honking in the background. The juxtaposition of man’s self-made chaos with the peace of trees and wildlife just gives me a great feeling inside. The weather was beautiful too, I had stripped down to my tank top and was enjoying the sun….was. Suddenly I look up, and it looks like the bleeping end times are about to come. I have never seen such an opaque gray! Well, I simply took a relaxed stroll OUT of central park and under an overhang (this is becoming a pattern). It was none too soon either. About two seconds later the heavens opened up and basically let loose upon the begrudged New Yorkers around me. I watched and took pictures for a while and decided that I would go to freaking Times Square even if it was in the rain. Well, I did….and it really wasn’t as exciting and rewarding as I had hoped.

So…back to Long Island. Now my battery is dying and I must go!

Well, it’s Tuesday now, and yes I’ve missed a few days with the Bee-Logging. So Saturday I got up around noon or so, did my hairs and makeups and then got my Sari on. Rachel and I went to the awesome Indian Classical concert. It was really really amazing. Ustad Imrat Khan seriously rocked out on his Sitar. It was too bad that there was no air conditioning in the buildings. I was absolutely dying of heat, so we left at about 1:15am. Even though we left early, I think we still got our money’s worth.

So, we left the building and headed towards the subway, when my friend realized that the train would be leaving at 1:48….with the next one not coming until 3:49. So of course, the subway didn’t come to take us to Penn Station until 1:50. At this point I was totally tired, but in good spirits. So we finally got to Penn and then wandered around to kill time.

Best Image of the night: Eating a hot dog, wearing a sari, in front of Madison Square Garden

We also got a drink each (and they were very effective) and then went back to the station to wait for our train. The ride home was filled with hundreds of very drunk and promiscuous young new yorkers. We got to hear, in far to much detail, the sexual escapades of two young gentlemen in front of us.

Sooo, after this, I got in and got to sleep at around 6 am. This ended up with staying in bed (read: couch) until 6 pm, after which I went and played Wii with my friend, yippee!

The next day (yesterday), we actually got up early HOLY CRAP and headed to Flushing, Queens for some Dim  Sum. This consisted of Chinese ladies with carts full of god-knows-what-is-inside-of-this-dumpling walking around and waiting for us to point at stuff that we wanted. I ate too many shrimp-filled items, but it was daaaang tasty. We walked around Flushing for a bit until my homie had to jet back to her school for a final. We parted ways, and I got on the subway towards Grand Central Station. A couple stops later, an entire class of smallish demon-children (sorry, that’s harsh. I’m sure they were very nice children…albeit loud as shit) got on and proceeded to take over the subway car. This too came to pass, and I made my way to the Guggenheim, which was under construction, so I didn’t get to see the awesome outer portion However, there were many great pieces of art in there. It was totally great. After I saw everything contained within, I strolled over to Central Park and laid on a rock, listened to sigur ros, and looked up at the tree branches above me.

After a while of this I figured it was time to head back, got to Jamaica station…saw a train that said Hempstead….but the word West was in front of it. West Hempstead is the same as Hempstead, right? Um…no. Soooo, after taking another train BACK to Jamaica Station, I got on the right train and finally got back to Garden City. Now today I’m just taking it easy and hanging out, and I should finish this because I’m on my friend’s computer and she will murder me

Well, in contrast to my earlier message, I fell back on my pillow and didn’t wake up until 11:30. That was fine though, I just took my time getting ready and then headed off on the 1:46 train to Penn Station. Then, after asking around a bit, I made my way on the subway to Union Square. Once there, I looked around the market and purchased a lovely loaf of bread. It started absolutely pouring at one point, so I took shelter with some other cityfolk underneath an overhang. (I like that phrase)

After a while I just wandered around the area and came upon a medium sized Episcopal cathedral. I went and sat in one of the pews and just thought for a while. It was peaceful, kind of an oasis among the craziness of the city.

Next I went and got on the train again and met up with a friend of my friend’s husband and we hung out. It was super fun and I had too much long island iced tea. hehehe.

So now I’m back at my temporary residence, pleasantly tired and looking forward to the rest of my trip. Tomorrow is the day of the Indian Classical concert which I am superly looking forward to. I’ll tell ya’ll how it goooooes.

After so much waiting, I arrived in New York yesterday morning. My kickass friend took me to her very pretty school and then I went back to where I would be staying and promptly passed out for about 3 hours. Then we walked to this tasty Indian Restaurant. All in all, a very low-key day, just enjoying the ambiance of lovely Garden City. Even if it is the city of The Man, I love all the cute houses and their decorative shrubberies (even though one looked like a turd…teehee)

So, it’s about 9:30 am right now and I’m debating whether to get up and take my shower and get a move on. I was hoping to actually sleep in, but that’s been pretty difficult for me lately. So, today! Today I think I will probably hit up the Rubin Museum of Himalayan art, for sure. Besides that, my schedule is really open. I think I may go to the Union Square Market and buy myself some produce. Alright, it’s about that time. Shower for Libby!!!

I use the term “end” loosely, since this will probably go on, at least emotionally, for a very long time.

Tonight is the last night that my father will be in this house. Tomorrow he moves out and this horrible chapter of my life will, I hope, close and make way for something much better. As much as I’ve been waiting for this, and as much as I know my parents should have split up long ago, it’s almost too hard for words.

A minuscule part of my mind is still trying to say “no, I don’t want mommy and daddy to break up.” I still have this vision of Christmas when I was 8 years old. The family was all together, it seemed perfect, at least in my young and uninformed mind. But those days are gone forever. I’m hiding in my basement bedroom, I can hear the sounds of packing happening above me. Everything is crumbling. But really, I guess it crumbled years ago.

It’s just more obvious now.

He straight out asked me if I’d every visit him, and if I’d ever speak him again. How do I answer that? “I don’t know?” This is all too real right now…far too vivid. I’m glad I’m getting out of here for a couple weeks. I think I’d probably have a nervous breakdown otherwise. Lord knows it doesn’t help having finals in the middle of this mess. I really don’t want to whine right now, though.

I’m just saying that, well, this is probably the hardest thing I’ve ever dealt with in my life. I don’t even want to care this much. I’d like to just take it in stride as a necessary change. Instead, I’m laying here unable to really go to sleep. Who can sleep when your family is breaking up above your bedroom?

The day I’ve waited so long for has arrived…but I don’t know what to do now.